25 Reasons Why Cats Are Better Than Children

You heard me right. Cats are better than children.  After years of dealing with both cats and children, I have come to the conclusion that cats are the more superior of the two. You don't believe me? I have proof!

1. Cats don't sleep in their own pee and poo. My cats won't even step in their litter box if I forget to clean it.
   
2. Cats don't keep harping you with stupid questions. They won't keep asking you "why?" at the most inconvenient times.
   
3. Cats can keep themselves clean. You don't need to give them a bath every single day.
   
4. Cats don't need round-the-clock attention. They are the low-maintenance members of the family.
   
5. Cats don't whine. Thankfully! Whining is just so annoying.
   
6. Cats don't talk incessantly. Children just never know when you need them to shut up.
   
7. Cats don't cry at the top of their lungs to manipulate you. You won't need to have a soundproof booth installed in your home in order to keep your sanity.
   
8. Cats don't complain. They are the masters of cool.
   
9. Cats don't need to go to school. No tuition fees, no PTA meetings, no phone calls from the school principal telling you your cat got into trouble again.
   
10. Cats sleep all day so you can have peace and quiet. Ahh... relaxation when you're home from work sounds like heaven.
    
11. Cats don't require milk formulas. Your grocery bill won't give you a headache.
    
12. Cats rid the house of pesky insects and mice. Now if only they could get rid of pesky children.
    
13. Cats are quite capable of being on their own for the day. You don't need to hire a babysitter to watch them when you're out.
    
14. Cat food doesn't need cooking or lengthy preparation times, so you can order Chinese food for yourself and pour out some kibbles for them.
    
15. Cats rarely get sick. You won't have a head-spinning medical bill and so many absences from work each year tending to sick children.
    
16. Cats play quietly. You don't have to remind them every single minute to keep the noise down.
    
17. Cats don't sweat. Have you ever been in the same room as children who've been out playing in the sun? Ugh!
    
18. Cats are born cute. Most newborn babies look like they could star in a horror flick.
19. Cats won't ask you for money. Ding ding ding!
    
20. Cats won't ask you if they can go see a concert of that rock band you're sure are worshipers of the devil.
21. Cats won't smoke, drink or do drugs under peer pressure. Well, catnip doesn't count.
22. Cats normally come when they are called.
23. Cats are easier to train than most children.
    
24. Cats can be spayed or neutered so you never have to worry about them getting pregnant or impregnating someone.
25. If cats do get pregnant, you can sell their kids!
    

This article was written for the purpose of entertaining its readers. The opinions of the author expressed herein do not necessarily state or reflect those of the Hubpages community and may not be used against the author in a court of law. :P